Crazy to internet: application joke

One friend says to another:
"I have Facebook, Twitter, Google
Plus, MSN Messenger and Skype accounts."
2nd Friend: "Dude, do you have a life?"
1st Friend: "OMG! No! Send me the link! I will make an account..

Obama Joke: Become idiot

John calls WHITE HOUSE
John: I want to become the next president of USA ..
Obama: Are you an Idiot ?
John: No , Why ? Is it Compulosry to become an Idiot for president? 

Sorry wrong number....

Sardar make a call to his home.
Servant picked the phone.
Sardar: Give phone to my wife.
Servant: She is sleeping with her husband.
Sardar: But I am her husband calling you from my office.
Servant: Now what to do?
Sardar: Kill both of them.
After killing......
Servant: What to do with dead bodies?
Sardar: Put them in our swimming pool.
Servant: But there is no swimming pool in home.
Sardar: Sorry wrong Number...

Clapping to Mosquito, jokes

A baby mosquito came back from 1st flying.
His dad asked : How did you feel ?

He replied : It was wonderful, everyone was clapping for me...

Joke: Love Your Enemies!

The great leader addressed the mass: What I hate most is that laziness has been our greatest enemy.

Later the Saint came and gave a short speech: My dear people, we should learn to love even our enemies!

Youth Joke: Boys Have Girlfriends

Know a new fact:
20% of boys have brain. And rest have? Rest have girlfriends!

New Year Joke: New Year's Wish

On New Year’s Eve, Judy stood up at the local pub and said that
it was time to get ready. At the stroke of midnight, she
wanted every husband to be standing next to the one person
who made his life worth living.

Well, it was kind of embarrassing. The bartender was almost
crushed to death.

Christmas Joke: Jack joined the Lord's Army

Jack was in front of me coming out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands. The preacher grabbed Jack by the hand and pulled him aside.

Christmas Santa The Pastor said to him, 'You need to join the Army of the Lord!'

Jack replied, 'I'm already in the Army of the Lord, Pastor.'

Pastor questioned, 'How come I don't see you except at Christmas and Easter?'

He whispered back, 'I'm in the secret service.'

Merry Christmas! Happy New Year!!